CALL CHELSEA PERETTI

A WHOLE NEW POD

Chelsea is joined by Scott Aukerman and Brendon Walsh for a very special all advertisement pod. Also with: Nick Kroll, Moshe Kasher, Aisling Bea. 

J.A.R.S

A punning Rick Glassman and dazzling Chelsea meet for the first time, scrutinize each others mouth sounds, and discuss misophonic reactions to chip crunchin, ice chompin, and sharp perfumes. Also: Rick’s comfort in lying and lack of self-consciousness, Chelsea’s lack of feeling, the alpha/beta dynamic, Rick’s stand-up secret (act outs), merits of being high, Rick’s troubled left testicle, donuts vrs sundaes, a Chabbat caller bails, Detroit landmarks, a compelling vision of Chelsea on Rick’s podcast. 

REUNITED

Todd Glass and Chelsea are reunited for a robust session of selling items with every ounce of their souls.

P MUNCHER JOE MANDE

Hacks writer and Tiktok enthusiast Joe Mande joins for a podcast that takes a neggy turn midway through, culminating in a pizza party! Callers watch TV and walk around creaky environments slamming doors through a discussion of: the Parks N Rec writers room, the societal merits of being a hater, Dave King's debate pod, how to approach celebs, gross social media recipes, fermented foods, babka, and what Joe pickles. Canned peaches girl calls again.  A “bewildered” caller tells Chelsea she posts too much and doesnt get enough engagement. Another caller let's Chelsea know that her brother does not like Chelsea. A girl calls Joe: "Chris." A commenter says Joe looks 70. A girl describes her past lives, as explored through meditation. PCP and Fit Shortie. Slash g. Slash s.

WHAT IS YOUR BUDGET AND WHAT IS A TRINKET

Chelsea takes calls & goes through your voicemails, answering all your burning questions about social media resentments, hoarders, rejection, crushes, adult friendship, spontaneity lovers versus planners, family movies, celeb friends, rattlesnakes and other predator animals in cities, travel, coffee quitters, trinkets and gift-giving. A foreign government musician calls! A special voicemail music mix by the legendary Kooool Kojak.

MR MIMS

Author of the upcoming cookie recipe book "Crumbs", former food writer for the la times and die hard wendy williams fan joins CCP to discuss citrus, the pch, willow smith, marie kondo quitting, calling people honey, comment sections closing time vibes, cookie ice cream sandwiches, ozempic bruising, plastic use, composting and spaghetti limone. Canned peaches/tahini girl shocks the pod. A discussion of an ideal international record time. A campaign for charoset to be a year round snack. Chelsea is a new podcast listener and shares thoughts.

DELETE THIS PODCAST / “GREAT” “EP”

Chelsea chats about robot overlords then makes several half-hearted attempts at guided visualizations with largely disinterested callers who probably have Aphantasia. An overlong discussion of B12. Salad talk. A celebration of Kojak’s songs. Comment section outrage. Sweet tooth snacks. Protein. A brown recluse cameo featuring tunneling necrotic flesh. 

APHANTASIA, MOIST FLESH, DAMPFRANCISCO & SUPER TASTERS

Concord's own Blake Anderson is in studio for a high-octane, alarming ep in which we learn that Aphantasia, though it affects 1% of the population, affects 95% of CCP callers. Harrowing updates on a past ep's attack mini poodle and Chelsea's Blokudoku score. A hyper, coffee-fueled, spooky consortium on coyotes, mountain lions, work passwords, airports, Cycle Yanks, and rabies. Chelsea chases another Pulitzer in her deep dive investigative journalism around key words: "Virginia" and 'dogs" and introduces the show's first SuperGavel(tm). Some food tests. Episode culminates in a super-taster test strip tasting. 

A ROIS BY ANY OTHER NAME

Chelsea has garish accidentally purple eyebrows and hosts comedy genius Roisin Canarty. As Chelsea squints for invisible subtitles that never come, she learns about claggy foods, sliding fruit, and the best mascara.

KEEP IT TRUCKIN

A very bay ep with one of chelseas jr high school besties, a dr w a phd in theology and impeccable penmanship, Sarai Crain comes to the show. Songs! A discussion of being silly as a survival mechanism in 7th and 8th grades, shy roasters, crimped bangs, perms, rayon as a dominant textile, starter jackets, used leggings. Chelsea learns that many of her callers used to be emo. Chelsea as a failed blond. A callers Brazilian Petroleum fail and a teachers “sounds naive” in red ink. DJP caller ! First time drunk. Oysters / mussels / spengers. Chelsea learns she has mispronounced Appalachian her whole life.